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Don’t worry about common decency Neon, I’ll give it a wide berth by using the tried and trusted tactics of staggering drunkenly over in an impressive way and striking up a conversation. Then I’ll stop half way through and weave unsteadily to the correct bunch of tarty bits and hit them with the old “Do you want to see and elephant then luv?†routine. Slurred just enough to get them oiled up in anticipation and preparing them for later by smoothly splashing a bit of Old Peculiar over their jugs at the same time.
It’s an absolute banker.*
*Unless they’re lesbians of course, and believe you me, having tried this a few times you’d be actually amazed at just how many clam jousters there are around these days.
You can’t knock thongs Insane, they give great vaggies (that’s a female wedgie, by the way) and you can use ’em to floss her pyobs out of your teeth after you’ve been chewing on her stamped bat. (On the subject of which here’s an important tip for you. Once you’ve done this never go into town on the Saturday after and have a fish butty for your dinner, no matter how ropey the beer has made you. Honestly, it’ll put you off fish butties for years and years. Seriously.)
I’m quite willing to go in first Neon, but be warned, if it’s a successful op then there’s a good chance that you’re going to have to take one for the team and get lumbered with the moon faced nightmare on the left.
While the server is open to everyone who wants to play on it, we retain the rights to kick off any player who is being sexist or just plain rude.
Beth Scofield, Ilminster, Somerset, UK
Good for them.
But the one in the middle would definitely get it, the dirty slag, and the one on the right could join in too. The one on the lefts a definite no though, I’d have to palm her off on a mate or send her down to the shop for some more beer or summat.
*edit* Actually, they look a bit breastitute, so I’m thinking that they might be a bit young so I’d probably have to send ’em away and tell them to come back in a few years. I obviously need to ensure that fugly is gonna get served at the offy before I do anything.
While the server is open to everyone who wants to play on it, we retain the rights to kick off any player who is being sexist or just plain rude.
Beth Scofield, Ilminster, Somerset, UK
Good for them.
But the one in the middle would definitely get it, the dirty slag, and the one on the right could join in too. The one on the lefts a definite no though, I’d have to palm her off on a mate or send her down to the shop for some more beer or summat.
It’s all very well them saying all this through adverts but what you can and can’t do changes to suit them I reckon. The other day I followed the advice of an advert and after telling a girl she could get tiscali broadband for 12.99 I showed her my cock and all of a sudden there are bloody busies knocking on my door and shouting something about indecent exposure. I wish these idiots would make up their bloody minds.
Bloody hell, they’ve got that old jukebox favourite “Speak English or Die!” by SOD on there. An absolute classic.
Well, I say it was a jukebox favourite but that’s only in a pub where people got bunged out of the window during rucks, which wouldn’t be so bad except the bar was on the first floor.
All good harmless fun of course (except for the people who got launched out of first floor windows and had to be carted off in an ambulance). Anyway, happy days.
At the moment Armed Assault doesn’t have a UK publisher (how absolutely ridiculous is that, by the way?) but assuming that it gets one it shouldn’t be too long before it appears. It’s due out in Germany and eastern Europe at the end of November.
Anyhow, I reckon that even if the RO servers are full a lot of that games players are going to disappear when AA comes out.
So given the options above I’d say you’re best holding off on a second server and just sticking with a Spazzfest 2 one for now.
Wrong thread I know, but has anyone any idea when Bandidas is coming on the telly?
Here’s the thread about it
http://xdcuk.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=255
Obviously, if your missus mentions hot lesbian scenes involving the 2 actresses you might want to play it cool and feign disinterest – but keep it in your wank bank for when she’s buggered off home!
@=XDC=NeonSamurai wrote:
Oh dear god!
That’s just wrong.
None of them look like Kirsty Alsop.
They won’t be getting my custom.
Although by some cruel twist of fate this Allsop woman does look a bit like a ropey sex doll (albeit a sex doll with some bizarre salad dodging chip fetish and a badly set eye which should get you a discount on the shop price):
Before anyone clicks that link you need to know that I got first dibs on face 12, and have had first dibs on it for months and months.
Anyhow, you can’t win with birds. I did suggest to my other half that we bought a (female) one of these and we could pretend we were having a threesome with a corpse and she went barmy! Eeeh I don’t know, women eh!
If it’s politics that you want then here’s a website for cats that look like Hitler.
Back when I was a lad my mate was walking home one day when this police van pulled up and this rozzer set this big fuck off alsation on him. Halfway through his ordeal it turns out that the criminal they were after was elsewhere and my mate just looked like him. So the pow-lice (fuck the pow-lice and all that) jumped back in their van and left my mate laid on the floor a bit chewed up and needing some new underwear.
Now obviously, you can read into this all you like about the pitfalls of mistaken identity and profiling and all that bollocks but the important thing is that it really was piss funny (not for my mate of course, but the rest of us thought it was hilarious).
If it’s a completely free orcs n dorks game you want then you’d be better off playing Silk Road I reckon.
That’s gay too though, though not as bad as World of Warcraft. That’s about as gay as Dale Winton in a ballerina’s outfit with a candle rammed up his fudge tunnel.
