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God no, I’m far too old for all that fighting malarkey. Anyway, nobody can teach me anything about being dead trendy – I’ve been to Leeds.
There was some story about why my mates fist was covered in blood and I remember him telling everyone about it but I can’t remember what it was. I’m afraid I was very drunk at the time.
@=XDC=sPUNKer wrote:
So is that you drunken and leering on the left SOIA?
Nah, haven’t had long hair in nearly 10 years me. Don’t knock it though, in my twenties I can absolutely 100% guarantee that having long hair got me sex much easier than I’d have got it otherwise. Plus I spawned it when all that grunge music got big on that front: Long story short, liking 80’s OI! music, thrash metal and being a flat broke drunk meant I looked like a grunge fan long before grunge ever got big. Then Nirvana and Pearl Jam got massive and all of a sudden there were loads of middle class birds in stripy tights who thought I was great and wanted to sit on my nob. Whilst all the kiddies desperately tried to find out what size Docs they needed and grow their hair to get on the bandwagon I was transformed overnight from being some ugly lout who birds wouldn’t look at twice to enjoying something of a golden era on the blart front. And all quite by accident as well. Still, them’s the breaks!
So anyway, there’s a picture with some kind of caption about fisting on that site. I’m the smaller bloke on the left on that picture. I’m not a midget though. The other lad on there is 6’5″, which also happens to be the reason I’m not calling him a puff for putting his arm around me.
@xdc the doc wrote:
Guys… he has problems… show a bit of humanity. He needs help – not a kick in the teeth. Im saying this seriously.. not as a liberal wishy washy lefty but as a doctor who is genuinely concerned at how vulnerable people can go of the rails if the wrong buttons are pushed.
Doc is probably right. Still, I’m one of these people who think that whingers who claim to have “mental problems” should be given a smack and told to get a grip. That would sort em out.
Real name’s Michael – but it’s probably quicker typing soia anyway.
Can’t post a picture cos I don’t have one but there was/is a picture of me up on a mates myspace site. Can’t grab it though it’s on some kind of fade in/fade out thing. Can’t link to it now cos I’m at work but he calls himself “CheesyBammo” on it if anyone is even vaguely interested in finding it.
First things first, science fiction has to at least be semi-believable. I reckon that to do this all people have to do is make sure that the characters in a science fiction film react in a believable way to the stuff around ’em.
Children of Men. Clearly not thought through. Think of that time you were sat on the train and that annoying little f***er of a baby just wouldn’t stop bawling. Think of all them times those little scrotes ran around in their tracksuits shouting and screaming up the street and you just wanted to throttle all of them. Remember all those times in town when stupid bitches use their prams as battering rams to get everyone off the pavement, stop traffic and generally act like her cretinous rug rat should be treat like royalty just because she shot it out of her stamped bat a few months ago. Yeah love, you’ve got a butchers dustbin like a welly bob top cos of that little shit – but I’m sorry – the world don’t owe you for it.
Now imagine a world where none of this could ever happen cos no-one could have kids. See! It would be absolutely ace! In Children of Men they make out everyone is dead upset about it!? Bollocks, I’d be dancing to work everyday, laughing my cock off during all my waking hours and then sniggering myself to sleep.
I’d also make sure I was in the army. Then we could have had a decent ending. King Arthur takes mother and child down stairs, past lots of shocked and awestruck soldiers, he gets out of the door and leads her awa-DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA
*Reload*
DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA
*Reload*
DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA“Bloody hell you lot, it’s a good job I was around. I’ll tell you, while you lot were stood gawping they almost got away! Jesus, that was a close one. Anyway, cheer up – there’s still plenty of them bloody politically correct numpties to get, everyone’s a winner!”
Roll credits 10/10.
Instead it gets a 5 because they shot a hippy. Hurrah!*
*(No offense to any hippies, obviously).
@=XDC=Mouse101uk wrote:
Sickofitall, can i have a look at that photo after you, erm just for research purposes of course you understand. 😳
Yeah, course you can fella. I’ve finished with it now – fill yer boots.
Anyway, on a completely unrelated note, anyone seen Vic about?
I got a Cadburys Creme Egg for him.
Just so everyone knows I did demand Insane post a nuddy pic of his bird but I edited it out of my post. This is because on consideration I didn’t want anyone thinking I would be so crass as to knock one out to a picture of a clan members missus.
Now obviously if she was really fit I probably would, but I think it would be rude not to if she looked a right dirty sort.
Anyway, it’s at least decent of Wipers to own up to his part in this. Unfortunately not all his countrymen are so noble. That Irish lad that talks to me of a morning on my way to work was cringingly denying all knowledge and professional twat Boner from U f***ing 2 has yet to admit any responsibility either.
I voted yes because really he should be banned for hacking people’s accounts but like everyone says, it won’t do any good. Plus the kid is childish enough to try hack and mess up something on the website as well if he got a ban.
I’m amazed he’s 23 though. Reading his posts I honestly thought he was about 15.
He’s just another keyboard hero as far as I’m concerned. Someone who uses the internet to “talk” to people in a way that would get him absolutely effing leathered if he spouted off like that in a pub or something.
He’s what sociologists would term a “complete bell-end”.
@=XDC=NeonSamurai wrote:
Yeah, but to be honest mate, you made all that stuff up. Our boss tells me that you’re still living at home, ride a pushbike and your boyfriend’s no oil painting…
Well as long as Insane’s bike is a Grifter (you can make your Grifter sound like a motorbike by turning the rubber end of the mudguard into the tyre – how ace is that!!) then it’s okay, but if it’s a BMX then that’s a fucking girls bike and that’s not on. Chopper and Tomahawk I’ll turn a blind eye to because although Camilla used to have one she was the first bird to play with my nob for me so whilst I think they are technically a girls bike I have quite good memories of them. Except for that time i went arse over tit putting the front brakes on one coming down the sandy hill and make a good job of sanding my face off.
Anyway fuck this, thinking back to that time with Camilla has made me, er thirsty, yeah that’s tight, thirsty. I’m off for a bit, just give me 15 minutes.
Chipwreck.
I’ve just got back from Dusseldorf where I’ve seen about 10,000 birds with decent bodies who actually dress in a feminine manner (and hardly any salad dodgers) and in the 2 days I’ve been back all I’ve seen is fat slags in tracksuits.
I’m sure there used to be plenty of very good looking women in this country, I can remember it quite clearly. It’s totally depressing.
@=XDC=Mouse101uk wrote:
Still think they are the best band around at the moment though.
Bloody hell fire! Is that right? Are things really that bad?? Stone me, who’d have thunk it. I’m too old for all this pop music malarkey that’s for sure.
On the plus side I did channel flick onto Def Leppards video for “Pour Some Sugar On Me” the other day. Now it might be one of the most terrible songs ever by one of the most terrible bands but it did right cheer me up shouting “Give us a drum roll, Rick” at the telly for 5 minutes. Much to the consternation of my missus.
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