S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl – £3.50 @ Steam

Well, in the grand scheme of things it’s better than Fallout 3 by exactly the same margin that it’s worse than getting Horatio off Marta Zawadzka.

So, as one look at Marta Zawadzka should illustrate – it’s a lot fucking better than Fallout 3.

So, what you need to do is engineer a situation whereby Marta is talking to the sergeant, as it were, whilst you are playing Fallout 3 (medium settings should do, you’ll probably not be paying that much attention at the time). The fucking abortion of Fallout 3 will be counterbalanced by the ministrations of Marta which will leave you with a mid point exactly where Stalker lays on the how good things are curve and you’ll then immediately know whether it’s worth the money.

The only slight hitch I’ve found is that fantastically fit and dirty looking Polish titty models tend to ignore open invites from blokes in the UK to come over here and perform sexual acts which would leave them with a face like a painter’s radio.

I know this from bitter personal experience. Or put it real terms – Bloody lesbians ignoring my e-mails.

Failing that then you might just have to chance parting with £3.50 and hoping you like it.

Good luck.

😆 @ soia