Vanguard

These orcs n dorks games have stopped making any kind of sense to me. I’ve played a few of them and they’re all the same. You start off by taking to some gay looking bloke who calls himself an “elf” who gives you some huge long speech about recovering the Sword of Dobber from some evil demon and how he ‘s looking for heroes to undertake this mammoth task. He then asks you if you’re interested at which point you say “yes” on account of the fact that you’ve seen Lord of the Rings and if a bunch of kids and Bob Geldof can pull that shit off then you should be capable. Then this “elf”, having got you roped in to this epic adventure by telling you how you will be required to travel many miles and fight many large and terrifying monsters then sends you off to kill 200 fucking chickens for their bastarding feet or something. What I really don’t understand is why the hell is this weirdo with the spock ears is collecting chicken feet in the first place? Christ, you think the internet hasn’t enough sexual perversions to keep people happy? What’s worse is he’s asking the other 10,000 people playing to do the same thing. You even get people coming up to you asking if they can join you feeding this blokes sick fantasies by collecting these chicken feet together!

Err, no thanks mate, I’m off to help that fat kid who calls himself a “dwarf” stick his nob in a tub of maggots. He’s far less weird than the bloke you’re helping.

Anyway, since you then never get the option to tell him to stick his sicko epic quest where the sun don’t shine you’re pretty much knackered (unless you like epically slaying chickens with a big stick of course).

So yeah, “Vanguard – Saga of Heroes who’ve all killed 200 chickens”. Sounds great.

Munkee and I once chopped the heads and feet off 117 Turkeys… well I did that part – the country bumpkin that he is, got the cushy weighing job!

(We both chickened out of the actual gutting part!)

Oh good greif! if it wasnt bad enough that Turks got me making puns he’s now roped you into it 😯

Gutted! 😛 😳

i played the beta for a bit. looks like it could be a really good game. much like what EQ was. i stopped playing when after 3 days the gms hadnt managed to put me back in the world as fell out of it so i gave up

i think that it will attract a lot of the hard core mmo players away from wow. its a classic in the making i think and i will be watching its progress