sickofitall

@=XDC=sPUNKer wrote:

that person of african decent (twattish PC that never gets used) is a bumbling eedjit who just wants to see a teacher that pisses him off lose his job over a word that is used all the time by this person of african decent and his fellow chums of african decent and was used in that context. The teacher could have just as easily have said homes or somesutch slang.
I wish they would all fuck off and use their brains. Hey white man or black man or whatever call me a whitey or a spic I dont give a fark 🙄

Word, nigga!

Eeeh, drug addicts, what a bunch of crazy characters!

I knew lad who tried to climb a building once. Maybe the drugs turned him into Spiderman, who can say? Anyhow, his superpowers lasted just long enough for him to get 2 storeys up before they gave out. Scratch 1 druggie.

I knew a bird who went out with a drug addict. Nice lass she was, wouldn’t ever say a bad word about anyone. Honestly, even a complete cunt like me couldn’t really fault her. Anyhow, her boyfriend kicked all her front teeth out so that was her fucked. Hey ho, life is cold! There is a strange kind of balance to this though, because I knew
a lad who did heroin and his bird decided one night to give him a pint glass extension to his face. On the funny side, it did give us to chance to sing the old metal/hardcore
classic “Scarred For Life” to him everytime we saw him. I don’t know whether he liked it or not but it was a good laugh. So there you go, I knew a bird who got her face mushed in by her drug addict boyfriend and a drug addict who got his face mushed in by his bird. Yin and yang and all that mystical stuff – spooky!

There was also that drug addict who got seven shades of stringy shit kicked out of him for kicking my mates car. I’m sure that like all drug addicts he had some fucking sob story (they’ve all got one, I’ve known quite a few when I come to think of it) about being a “victim” of some circumstance or another. This little fucker knew all about being a victim that night, I can tell you!

Like my mate who was addicted to drugs. No-one cared about his sob story of course after he raped this lass we knew. Never saw him since. Not sure what became of him. Just know that the police weren’t involved and certain shady characters around at the time felt they could deal justice a bit swifter and more effectively than the system. Where could he have been for the last 15 years? At the time, people decided that it was wise not to ask too many questions.

So there you go, I could go on but you get the drift – violence, death, criminal damage, rape, assault, tramp shagging (now that’s a good story but I’ll save it for when I start up a porno site). All I know is that all the drug addicts I’ve ever met are dead weight. They’re miserable, they have miserable lives and they have miserable ends. You might as well take ‘em all out back and shoot ‘em in the head. You’d be doing most of them a favour.

So you should legalise drugs – make them bastards pay some taxes whilst they fuck up everything around them before they end up dead in a ditch somewhere. It’s the only contribution you’ll ever get from them. Still, you know what they say – there’s nowt as funny as folk.

“Scarred For Life”
Dedicated to _________________________________________________________”
(Insert the name of your drug addled friend with the pint glass shaped scar right in the middle of his mushky here)
http://www.lyricsdownload.com/biohazard-scarred-for-life-lyrics.html

Muse must be one of the greatest pop music person/bands/computer programmers going to today. I know this to be true because whilst I don’t know whether he or she is a person, a group or a “dj” but I’ve actually heard of Muse. Now since I’m the most ignorant person in Europe when it comes to this pop music malarkey, if I’ve heard of Muse then by definition then they have to be massive.

Just to prove the point, I’m thinking back to the last pop song I remember and I’m pretty certain it was the one that went:
“No, no”
“No – n – no, no”
“No – n – no, no”
“No, no”
“There’s no lyrics!”

And I only remember that because it used to be on the video jukebox in a boozer I used to go to in Halifax and there was this one bit in the video where the extremely dirty looking female singer mooched up to the camera and pushed her jugs together in an “insert slagbat here for a big soapy tit wank” kind of way. This bit was always followed by everyone in the pub saying to their mate, with the utmost sincerity that they would really love to give that bird a right good shagging.

So Muse, fuck knows in truth. Doubt they have a bird that’s gagging for it as much as that one in that “There’s no lyrics” video though.

My theory is that you have to weigh up the potential benefits and pitfalls when taking risks. So, for instance, if you decide to mug that old granny in the street then the fact that you might do time (I say might because these days you probably won’t, but that’s the country gone to shit for you) means she really needs to be carrying enough cash to make that risk worthwhile.

So anyway Spunker, you might be right in your theory that Jesus might be the bastard offspring of a child murderer with a slag for a mum. On the other hand, you might just have condemned yourself to an eternity of excruciatingly painful bumrape at the hands of the giant Dale Winton demon in the seventh pit of hell.

So, weighing up the potential benefits and consequences here I’d have to say that I disagree with your theory and that god is a top bloke who is my best mate and I’ve never called his son the bastard offspring of a child murderer with a slag for a mum.

Just to make that clear – god is a top bloke who is my best mate and I’ve never called his son the bastard offspring of a child murderer with a slag for a mum.

Here’s the flag for Bradford

Look on the bright side, at least you weren’t relaxing in a gentlemans way when she walked in or you’d have had about 10 seconds before she got upstairs to close down your browser, jump up and do a mad chinamans trot to the bog whilst trying to pull your pants up from round your ankles so that you could flush away your wank hanky before she was any the wiser.

Now that’s a Mission Impossible – that pint sized sci fi nerd Tom Cruise dunt know the ‘alf of it.

@=XDC=NeonSamurai wrote:

If I’d have been in that studio, I’d have given him a good kicking too (not because of his girlfriend stealing antics, but because I reckon I could take him).

As long as you told everyone “Beating up that midget made me feel like a big man!” you’d be okay. But let’s be honest, we’d all love to fight a midget – you could just kick his face off.

Here’s a top tip for any single blokes out there who don’t fancy the idea of having sloppy seconds off a girl who’s been having dirty bog sex. All you have to do is go in there with all your mates whilst they’re half way through and all simultaneously hoik your beers into the stall.

Then, at the 5 to 2 rush at the end of the night you just need to avoid the trunter that looks and smells like she’s been dragged across a brewery floor.

This tip was told to me by some bloke I must have met somewhere once at some point. I’d never get involved with anything like that. No way.