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  • #17358
    SilverSides
    Participant

    Some old, some i havnt read before 🙂

    1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply drink boiling water. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

    2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

    3. Avoid arguments with your wife about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

    4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

    5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

    6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, after which you will be afraid to cough.

    7. You only need two tools in life – WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.

    8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    And one last thought for the day

    Some people are like slinkies – not really good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs

    #61225
    XDCsPUNKer
    Participant

    😆

    #61226
    VicJameson
    Participant

    @SilverSides wrote:

    Some people are like slinkies – not really good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs

    LOL, I love that quote 😆

    #61227
    XDCiNSANE
    Participant

    lmfao.. thats goin on me MSN

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